Getting too much advice? Here's my go-to phrase along with an idea that encourages engagement, curiosity, and boundaries while connecting in the moment.

I hope it helps and while I'm at it, here's your reminder (ahead of the holidays) to let go of parental perfectionism.

First, there’s no such thing as perfection. We’re all human, and we all make mistakes. The important part is what you do after that. When we don’t connect in a loving way in a moment, as long as a repair is made and the child experiences the parent as a stabilizing secure base, the child learns they can rely on the parent to show up for them.

So really, as parents, we will mess up, but we can free ourselves from the trap of trying to be perfect. By embracing mistakes and letting go of a perfectionist mindset, we can actually model for our children that it’s OK not to be perfect. If you were perfect all the time, your children would think they have to be perfect, too.