• Do your kids tune you out?

    Date: 2010.05.27 | Category: Parenting | Tags: ,

    Do you find yourself repeating something over and over? Funny how our kids can tune us out so easily and so consistently.

    My best suggestion is to stop what you’re doing and focus on the situation. I usually find that the reason I’m repeating myself is because I’m preoccupied with other things and not following through immediately when they don’t do something right away. By the time I notice that they haven’t, for instance, put away the legos like I asked them to, they’re already distracted and on to something else, and then I get mad.

    Of course I wish they’d just do what I ask, the first time I ask it.  But I can prevent having to repeat myself so much and feeling so much frustration if I do the following:
    1. Stop what I’m doing.
    2. Get eye level and make eye contact.
    3. Put my hand on their arm or shoulder.
    4. Turn my voice way down, almost to a whisper, and say something like, “Maybe you didn’t understand, or maybe you’ve forgotten, so I am going to say it again, and then I’d like for you to go do it.”
    5. Especially for my youngest, I might also just try something playful, like saying, “Hmm. I think I told you to do something, but I don’t know what it was. Maybe you can go do it and then surprise me!”

    Kids tune us out because we say the same things over and over.  No wonder!  The only thing we should repeat over and over is “I love you. You’re great!”